In Good Taste #24: Christmas Ferments
Get some pickles underway now to eat as part of your festive feast or give as gifts; a few other present ideas; taking life advice from Bill & Ted
Well, hello there! How are you?
Good I hope. Thank you so much for being here.
(Not up for the chitchat? Completely get it. Click the email title to go to a web-based version then jump straight to the recipes, the gift guide or Cultural Fun.)
If my calculations are correct, there are a mere 32 sleeps ‘til Christmas! Whether this alarms or excites you is deeply personal. No judgement. I am registering at a moderate twinkle on the yultide joy-o-meter as it’s not quite December yet and therefore a little too early to be feeling truly festive.
However, fermenting takes time so I hope it’s not premature to offer a few ideas for things that would make nice additions to the Christmas table or work well as gifts.
At this time of year I’m never quite sure where to draw the line between generous and overwhelming. I like things to feel bountiful: for there to be bowls of satsumas and nuts so the house feels comfort-and-joyish, for there to be little mince pies and maybe a few chocolate truffles in case anyone wants a sweet treat with a cup of tea. And, of course, I like for plates to be generously piled with good things on December 25th itself, with plenty for seconds and sandwiches too.
But I hate it if the whole of December degenerates into a constant parade of low-quality calories, day kicked off with advent calendar chocolate and rounded out by crisps, Quality Street and contextless pigs in blankets. I know that if I overdo things early in December then, by the time Christmas Day rolls around, I’m already jonesing for the abstinence of January. Basically, I want to make sure my gluttony is reserved for the good stuff.
I’m also over having the annual argument about whether Die Hard is a Christmas Film so don’t come at me with that old chestnut over the mulled wine. The Bruce Willis classic may have been released as a summer blockbuster but let’s admit that it is, at the very least, a Christmas-y film. Anyway. Look at this cake tribute I made to Alan Rickman’s Hans Gruber. This was many years ago. I’d just finished my first term at Leiths. My piping has improved since but I stand by the joke.
Festive Ferments
Having a few ferments around definitely helps with the festive excesses. Anything acidic or pickled (including cranberry sauce and chutney) will provide contrast to all the rich food. But making it something fermented will also aid digestion since you will add to the diversity of bacteria in your gut.
So, get a few jars going now and they’ll be ready in plenty of time for Christmas. A word of advice about giving fermented things as gifts though: since they are live - and centrally heated houses are warm - don’t put your pickles, krauts and chilli sauces under the tree and leave them there for days lest they fizz and leak all over someone else’s socks, jocks and chocolates.
Keep ferments in the fridge and get them out the morning that you’re handing them over. Also make it clear to your recipients how they need to be stored. So, whilst homemade is always lovely, it might be best to reserve these gifts as things to give to people you’re not travelling for days to see or who aren’t away from home for a long time themselves.
As well as the recipes below, I’d also suggest my spiced Red Kraut or Picallili as things that would go particularly well with leftovers or a cheeseboard. I’ve also got a jar of whole sprouts with garlic and caraway on the go, done just as a classic brine pickle (in the manner of cucumbers but with a 2% brine). I am now regretting not halving the things but they’re looking quite lively so I am confident they’ll be ready in time. “Sauersprout” is also an option - finely shredded sprouts given the sauerkraut treatment - but I recommend using a food processor to do the shredding. Doing it by hand will seriously deplete your goodwill to all mankind.
Recipe: Fermented Chilli Sauce
Makes approx 500ml - enough for two small bottles
This makes a great gift for the spice-lover in your life but do let them know that it needs keeping in the fridge…
Ingredients
For the ferment
300g red chillies, stalks removed
1 bulb garlic, cloves trimmed and peeled
2 sticks celery, chopped
1 bunch coriander, stalks only
To finish the sauce (optional)
1 tbsp cumin seeds
1 small cinnamon stick
3 allspice berries
100ml olive oil
maple syrup
cider vinegar
Method
Put the chillies, carlic, coriander stalks and celery in a scrupulously clean 500ml jar.
Make a 5% brine. eg 500ml water and 25g sea salt. If you do this with boiling water make sure it cools to room temperature before you use it or it will kill the lactic acid bacteria. Pour the brine over the chillies and use a pickle weight or sandwich bag filled with brine to make sure they are submerged. Seal the jar. Alternatively, if you don’t want to risk wasting brine, you can put the jar on a scale once it’s filled with chillies, garlic etc. and add just enough water to cover. Take the weight of the water and calculate 5%. Add this much salt then shake to dissolve once the jar is sealed.
Put the jar somewhere at room temperature and leave for 2 weeks to one month. “Burp” the jar regularly to let out gas and taste a little bit of chilli. When your desired level of funkiness has been reached, proceed to the next step.
Toast the spices in a dry pan and grind to a fine powder.
Drain the chillies, garlic etc. reserving the brine.
Put the chillies in a blender with about 100ml of brine and blitz. Add the oil and about half the ground spices and oil and blend again. Add more brine if necessary to get a consistency you like. I usually like it really smooth and quite thin (you can strain through a fine mesh sieve to make it even smoother if you like) but sometimes it's fun to keep the texture rough, like a salsa in which case present it in a jar, rather than a bottle.
Taste and balance the flavour with more spice, a little maple syrup and/or cider vinegar. Maybe even more salt.
Bottle and store in the fridge.
Notes (If Ifs And Ands Were Pots And Pans…)
If you want a milder sauce, substitute some of the chillies for red peppers.
If you have a dehydrator you can dehydrate the chilli mush left in the sieve when you strain the sauce. Let it get really dry, break up into flakes and mix with salt for a funky seasoning. A bonus byproduct for you or else two gifts for the price of one!
You don’t even have to do the spices and oil stage if you don’t want. You can just blend your fermented chillies with some of the brine to make a simple and flavourful sauce. It won’t have quite the same complexity but will still be delicious.
The sauce will separate slightly if it has sat for a while so just needs a little shake before serving. You can prevent this by including a tiny amount of xanthan gum (like a really tiny amount: less than 1/8 tsp) whilst blending.
Recipe: Beetroot “Gold” Coins
Makes one 750ml jar
Ingredients
500g (approx) golden beetroot
3 cloves galic, peeled
2 bay leaves
1 tbsp turmeric powder
1 tbsp black peppercorns
2.5% brine
Method
Peel, trim and thinly slice the beetroot. About 2mm. Use a mandoline if you have one. Otherwise a sharp knife and deep reserve of patience. A food processor will work in a pinch but won’t get you perfect rounds so will lack the gold “coin” effect.
Put the beets in a scrupulously clean 750ml jar along with the garlic, bay leaves and peppercorns.
Whisk the turmeric into the brine, pour it over the beetroot and use a pickle weight, sandwich bag of brine or beetroot top to make sure the veg stays submerged.
Close the jar and leave at room temperature, “burping” and tasting regularly until the beets have reached the desired level of acidity. Probably about two weeks.
Transfer to the fridge. They will keep for several months.
Notes (If Ifs And Ands Were Pots And Pans…)
Substitute half the beetroot for similarly sliced Jerusalem artichokes. These are absolutely delicious fermented but they don’t keep quite as well as the beets. They don’t go off but the sweet nuttiness they have when first fermented turns into a boring, one-note acidity and they slightly lose their crunch. Just make sure you eat them within a few weeks.
You can use sliced or grated fresh turmeric instead of powdered if you like but I find it doesn’t give such even colour.
The bay helps keep the pickles crunchy. Don’t be tempted to leave it out.
Recipe: Christmas Kraut
A very traditional white cabbage kraut with a couple of seasonal twists. Makes approximately one 1l jar.
Ingredients
1 head white cabbage
sea salt
100g dried cranberries
small bunch sage, leaves picked and finely chopped
1 clementine, zest and juice
Method
Cut the cabbage into quarters lengthwise and cut out the hard cores. If you don’t have a pickle weight, keep the cores which will do this job admirably.
Put a large bowl on a scale and set it to zero. Then finely shred the cabbage, adding it to the bowl as you go.
Take note of the weight of the cabbage. Calculate 2.5% of that weight in salt, e.g. if the cabbage weighs 1kg (1000g) then you need 25g salt.
Add the salt to the cabbage and toss well. After just a few seconds you’ll notice the shreds of cabbage begin to feel damp as the salt draws out water. Leave for about 30 minutes.
Add the cranberries, sage and clementine zest and juice and toss them through.
Put the everything in the jar, packing it down really well and adding any brine from the bowl. Use a glass or ceramic pickle weight, a sandwich bag filled with water or the cabbage cores you saved from earlier to keep the cabbage pushed under the brine. Ideally when you shut the lid it will keep this weight in contact with the cabbage.
Put the jar somewhere at room temperature but out of direct sunlight and leave it. Every few days open it up to let out any gas that has collected and to taste a little kraut. When the kraut has reached your preferred degree of tartness, move to the fridge. This will probably take between one and three weeks.
Recipe: Fermented Cranberries
Makes one 750ml jar
Ingredients
1 orange
1 cinnamon stick
1 tsp cloves
1 thumb-sized peice of ginger, thinly sliced
300g fresh cranberries
50ml (approx) brine from another ferment
2% brine
Method
Use a peeler to peel strips of zest from the orange and put them in a scrupulously clean jar.
Squeeze the orange’s juice and add this to the jar along with the cinnamon stick, cloves and ginger.
Wash the cranberries and put them in a large bowl. Use a potato masher to squish them a little bit. Not to a pulp or anything. They should still be whole, but you want most of them to have "popped" so they will let the brine in more easily.
Put the cranberries in the jar. Add a bit of brine from another ferment (I used some cucumber pickle juice) just to get things going and your new 2% brine.
Use a pickle weight or sandwich bag of brine to keep the berries submerged (cranberries are very buoyant so make sure they’re well weighted) and seal the jar.
Leave, “burping” and tasting occasionally for 1-2 weeks then transfer to the fridge. They will become lactically sour but lose some of that tannic sharpness.
Notes (If Ifs And Ands Were Pots And Pans…)
You can eat these as they are alongside cheeses or blend them up a bit into a sauce to have with the main meal.
You might want to add a little sugar or honey when blending. Taste and sweeten as you go.
Gift Guide Part 1
This morning I was just drinking my coffee and checking my emails. My favourite food newsletter Vittles had a gift guide issue so I was having a look at that when what did I find recommended but… me!
Yes! My fermentation workshop at the Dusty Knuckle was recommended by a lovely chap called Gavin Cleaver who came on the course earlier this year and kept me on my toes with plenty of questions.
TDK don’t do vouchers for my courses but tickets have just gone on sale for dates in Janaury and February. They tend to go quick so snap one up if you think you know a person who would like to come make pickles with me in Dalston.
You can however get vouchers for my private fermentation and pasta classes. They’re from £199 for two and would make a great present for the ferment-curious not able to get to Dalston on those particular dates.
But this isn’t just an opportunity for self promotion, I promise! Other nice, food-ish things that I can personally vouch for include:
If someone you know has expressed an interest in fermentation but a full class seems too much of a comittment then I would highly recommend James Read’s book, Of Cabbages and Kimchi. It’s a great introduction to the subject, covering the science and history of various popular ferments including kraut, kimchi, kefir, kombucha (all the Ks…), and more. Plus recipes for making and cooking with them. It’s wittily written and beautifully illustrated.
Those beautiful illustrations (by artist Marija Tiurina) are also available in print form. She calls them “gastro surreal” which I think is apt. I have the space kimchi and scoby hotel ones. They’re from £23 for A5.
Another great print option are Elizabeth Luard’s lovely watercolours which are only £18 for A4 including the festively-colured ruby chard taking shape here. Luard is quite the foodie national treasure and so multi-talented.
I would also recommend aprons from Bird Kitchen Clothing (£46). They are nicely cut and comfortable. I wear a denim one when I’m in the pottery studio which has great pockets and I got one of their tunics a few years back that I still wear all the time.
A bottle is always a safe bet and George Fredenham, AKA Flavour Fred, has some “wild booze” (from £17 for 35cl) that would be a more interesting alternative to something grabbed from the offy. You can also get vouchers for his foraging walks which take place all over the country. I really enjoyed the one I attended on Hampstead Heath.
That’s it for now. I’ll have a few more suggestions next week…
Cultural Fun
I was a bit poorly on Sunday and, looking for something familliar and comforting, re-watched Bill & Ted Face The Music. It’s not a movie that really needed to be made but I loved the first two films which came out in 1989 and 1991 and it doesn’t stomp all over my childhood memories.
Perhaps it’s because I was a bit coldy but I ended up surprisingly moved by their catchphase: “Be excellent to each other. And party on dudes.”
It might sound like slacker drivel but isn’t this actually great life advice? For what do we all want - especially at this time of year - except to change the world with kindness and have a bit of fun along the way. I am no longer high on Lemsip and still think there is truth in this.
I am going to see the Wonderstuff in December. James won’t come with me as they aren’t a formative band for him in the way they are for me. Sleep Alone was my favourite song but I was undiscerningly adoring of their entire output.
Any other aging indie kids going to be at the Shepherd’s Bush Empire on December 9th and fancy a pint?
Bye! See you soon!
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In Good Taste is a Sycamore Smyth newsletter by me, Clare Heal.
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